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My imas poems
Scotty:
You know, I just skimmed through this topic for the first time and realized...
...all these poems have the same blunt structure. Maybe you're aiming at a certain style, but it got rather stale to be honest.
It would be much better if the tone of each poem matched the idol's personality, and not just sound like a biography of each idol.
RoninatorMarx:
--- Quote from: Scotty on January 27, 2010, 02:42:48 am ---It would be much better if the tone of each poem matched the idol's personality, and not just sound like a biography of each idol.
--- End quote ---
Er, there's a problem with your suggestion, Scotty. If he does change the 'tone' to the idol's personality, then it would sound more of an autobiography, instead of the author's expression of feelings towards the idol/s (plus, doing as you suggests might just make an unexpected out of character routine).
PS: Read it with some added dramatic passion (but not too much like these guys. Just give it a fraction of their energy. lol).
blake307:
Scotty: Your point is understood. I don't intended to bore people here with my my poetry. I just basically used pretty much use the same concept with every one of my im@s poems, except for the COURAGEOUSLY SHY GIRL and THE BEAUTIFUL, Strong, and Intelligen net idol. I do realize that I could have come up with better introductions instead of using "This is about this idol" and "There is an idol in the company named _______." I'm thinking about my future short poems being from their own viewpoint describing themselves with whatever creative words I can think of.
Thanks for all those who have shown support for my im@s poems. I'll come up with more sometime in the not so distant future. ;)
Scotty:
--- Quote from: MarxMayhem on January 27, 2010, 09:19:22 am ---Er, there's a problem with your suggestion, Scotty. If he does change the 'tone' to the idol's personality, then it would sound more of an autobiography, instead of the author's expression of feelings towards the idol/s (plus, doing as you suggests might just make an unexpected out of character routine).
--- End quote ---
There is no problem. You're just not thinking correctly.
By tone, I mean the author should set the emotion of the poem itself to match that of the idol. Also, you should look up the word autobiography, I don't think you know what it really means.
I'll give you a quick example.
Let's take Yayoi. She's cute, hyper, and energetic. Because of this, the author should make a poem that matches her personality. Set a bright and cheerful tone, full of quick fire descriptions and whatnot.
This works for any idol. But keep in mind that this is something I only suggested. Blake can keep doing what he's doing.
Cien Laguoire:
Also, just to add, your poems lack a traditional structure. It looks like you're describing the character, rather than reciting a poem with your current structure.
Take a haiku for example:
This is a haiku
An example of a poem
blake steel should try this
No offense, if any was caused. Also, take a look at lyrics from your favorite band/singer or whatever. You never see them paragraphed together like the way you have done them. Instead, you see them versed together. If you do end up using a verse style for a character, try to stick to a particular aspect of their personality or character trait per verse:
Verse 1: about Yukiho being shy.
Verse 2: about Yukiho becoming an idol.
Verse 3: about Yukiho coming out to Makoto. ;D *shot*
Hope this helps. :)
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