Yay, acquired another moba I don't understand. I'll add that to the mountain heap of reasons I should learn the language.
For any Android players, if you were like me trying to play with VPNs and operator settings for hours to get it to install from the Play Store, you'll want to make sure the Google account you're using is set in Japan.
This address is the one driving the Play Store since they revamped it a couple months ago.
I feel really stupid now.
Oh, and if anyone else wonders, it seems to work fine with my normal IP and operator properties, and it doesn't seem to give me a hard time with root, despite what Play Store comments say. Nexus 5.
HOLY CRAP MY BATTERY AAAAAAIt also seems to accept my Yuros through a non-Japanese credit card, though I didn't hit that button yet. PayPal isn't supported in JP Google Wallet.