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Author Topic: Advent (Original Story)  (Read 1300 times)


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Advent (Original Story)
« on: February 27, 2011, 05:26:06 am »
Once in a while, I would write stories for my fictional story, called Advent. Advent took on many forms, such as a Riviera fanfic (which some elements of that still remain in one way or another), A Hollow Fields crossover (Which ultimately failed as a good concept due to some mature content mixing with a children's manga isn't such a good idea.)

But I finally found a concept which works for me: a futuristic cop tale mixed with some iM@S elements, some Riviera elements, and a twist of originality.

Other times, I would just write some fanfic due to boredom.

My first story will be Chapter 1 from Advent.

Please note that I AM open to constructive criticism because I'm trying to improve myself as a aspiring writer.

DAY 1 - 9:31 PM - Slant Police Station, Slant, Japan

"It's Code Blue, now. If you see any mysterious activity, feel free to arrest them. The situation is serious. I'm putting Fujishima in the lead. He's a rookie, but skilled. He won't let anyone down, am I right, Tomoki?"

"You can count on me, Captain."

"Alright. Dismissed."

My name is Tomoki Fujishima. Recently promoted to Detective. Skilled since childhood in solving mysteries others couldn't. Now my ultimate challenge lies ahead of me... Girls with Neutral Auras have been recently kidnapped. So far, no one has come forward with info, so my unit has pulled out Code Blue, which basically means that if you seem suspicious, you'll be arrested. A waste of time and resources, I agree. But the force no longer has a choice.

I leave the station and hop into my car. As soon as I turn on my new blue car, I hear the playful voice of Yayoi Takatsuki singing into my ears on the radio. Wonderful voice. 765 Productions really know how to pick their idols.

"Next up on Slant Radio 320.12, we'll continue the 765Pro marathon with 'Arcadia' by Chihaya Kisaragi. Stay tuned!" Commercials play.

Of all of the idols, I like Kisaragi and Yukiho Hagiwara the best. It would be great to act as their bodyguards.

While the commercials play, my cell phone rings. It's my partner, Carla Sakurai, who's also been recently promoted to Detective.

"What's going on?" I ask.
"Mainly nothing except the fact that I just got a boyfriend!" She says cheerfully.
"That's great news!"
"I hope you'll get to meet him soon. Anyway, what are your plans for tomorrow?"
"I'm planning to hopefully get some info, any at all, at Slant Academy."
"Good plan. Tomorrow is my day off."
"Lucky. I'll call you tomorrow. Good night."
"Good night, Tomoki."

I hang up. It's wonderful that she got a boyfriend. Now we'll see if I can get a girl for myself...

Arcadia starts playing on the radio...

I arrive at my home. A rather nice place with a cube design element. I finish listening to Arcadia and exit my car. I enter my house. I see a rather unpleasant sight. A message from my ex-girlfriend, Sohara Makoto.

"Tomoki, I just wanted to say what a fool you are. You get a girl that's perfect for you, and what do you do? You left me for nothing! I'm just--"

I end the message. I didn't want to hear anymore. I put in a CD by Yukiho Hagiwara. 'Kosmos, Cosmos' starts playing. I finish listening and shortly go to bed...

Advent - Sacred Ground - Chapter 1 - Code Blue
« Last Edit: April 16, 2011, 05:40:27 am by SereneMidnight »


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Re: Midnight's Original Works (Writing)
« Reply #1 on: February 27, 2011, 05:53:09 am »
d O_O b  <--- This is me giving two thumbs up. I'ma keep reading.

  Like a bird in the sky I believe i can fly


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Re: Midnight's Original Works (Writing)
« Reply #2 on: February 27, 2011, 08:28:07 pm »
Why, thank you! That means a lot.

I'm going to be updating 2-3 times a week, depending on how much I work on and such.

Chapter 2 - Advent: Sacred Ground

DAY 2 - 5:15 AM - Tomoki's Home, Slant Rural Area

I awake to a knock at the door. I bet it's Sohara, stalking me like usual...

I peer out of the window. It's actually Carla. She looks concerned.

I open the door and greet her.

"Tomoki, your ex found me. She won't leave me alone!" Carla shouts in distress.
I sigh. "Sohara, get your ass out here!" I shout out. A rather angry Sohara appears out behind a bush. Not the most creative hiding place ever, but I have to admit, I didn't see it coming.

"Leave before I arrest you for harassment. I'll have you know that Code Blue is in effect." I shout out in frustration.

She puts on a pouty look before storming off in her green convertible.

"Damn it. I'll probably sue later."
"...Why did you leave her...?" Carla finally said.
"I left her because she was obsessive with me. She wouldn't leave me alone, even when I told her to give me some space. When I told her to hit the road, she freaked out. She keeps leaving me harassing messages via e-mail and phone. I had to change my e-mail address, and my phone number because of her."
"..." Carla stares at me with an slightly agreed look.

"Anyway, I'm headed home. Try to get your Sohara situation taken care of. I'll be in touch."
"I will, and see you later."

Carla walks off to her light green motorcycle. She waves good-bye and rides off into the sunrise.

...I'm too tired for this. I'm going back to bed.

- 7:10 AM -

I wake up to my alarm, the way it should be. Yukiho is singing 'Massugu' as my alarm clock. I quickly get up, stop the alarm, get dressed and finally drive to Slant Academy.

Once I arrive, I see that not many students are outside, which I find strange, considering that morning classes aren't suppose to start until 8:00 AM.

"...What's up, Detective?"

I look at the person who greeted me. She's a short girl, around 5'1", has blue hair that grows to her shoulders and blue eyes and clothing to match.

"Hello, I'm trying to get info about the kidnapper."
"Good luck with that. Not many people will just open up to Detectives right away. I can help you with that." She says.
"Hmmm... I'll try without any help for now, but I'll take up your offer later. Who are you?"
She introduces herself. "I'm Serene Nakagawa."
"I'm Tomoki Fujishima. Your Aura Type?"
"I don't have an Aura... Strange, I know."
"Not to me... I have the same problem..."

All people are born with an Aura, many already set as Neutral Type. Your Aura is typed by the actions you do. Mainly a life Karma system. Good deeds will earn you a Justice Aura, a green flame. Justice Aura are a main requirement to join the police force. Although in rare cases, the forces will accept a Neutral or no Aura at all. An Evil Aura is based on horrible deeds, like organized crime, or mass murder. It shows a red flame. Neutral is a white flame. Legend has it that there is a fourth type of Aura called the Legacy Aura. No one has it.

The case with me is that, I'm not born with an Aura. My father had an Evil Aura and my mother an Justice Aura, but I don't think that's the case.

...I need to focus on Serene.

"You too? You're the only person I know that doesn't have one either." Serene looked surprised.
"I know, even the doctors were surprised."
"Anyway, the kidnapper only gets girls with a Neutral Aura. I find it strange he doesn't go for anyone else. I've even seen a couple of glimpses of them too."
"There's more than one!?"
"Yeah, but I can't really remember what they exactly what they look like, so I don't think I can help you much." Serene said sadly.
"...I think other students can tell me with your help."
"Even with my help, I doubt they'll say much. They don't even know there's more than one kidnapper."
"Well... Thanks for telling me. Can you do me a favor?"
"Sure, anything."
"Can you ask around for any info to help me out?"
"I can try."

I gave her my phone number and she put it in her pocket.

"I'll call when I find something."
"Thanks for your help."
"See you later!"

- 4:39 PM, Tomoki's Home -

I decide to report my findings to Carla.

"What...!?" She exclaimed when I told her about the possibility of more kidnappers.
"I didn't really believe it, either."
"What's our next step?"
"Wait until Serene calls me back."
"How old is she?" Carla gets curious.
"Don't get any funny ideas. We've only just met."
"Well, you should get ready for patrol..."
"Did you forget already? We've just been promoted to Detective. You don't need to patrol anymore."
"Well, I'm going to look around anyway."
"I think I should, as well. Get some fresh air and time to think."
"Okay. See you later, Tomoki."
"Good-bye, Carla."

I decided to head out for a drive.

- 8:57 PM, Slant Local Roads -

Serene said that there were more than one kidnapper. But the lack of eyewitness accounts strike me as odd. Can I really trust Serene...? What bothers me further is that Serene knows that there are more kidnappers, but with her laid-back personality she somehow forgets what they look like. Maybe I should call her about them. ...She's probably asleep, anyway. I'll find her at the academy tomorrow.

I hear the voice of Miki Hoshii on the radio. I had the opportunity to meet her once. A little bit of an airhead, but she's kind-spirited, with a Justice Aura to prove it.

After some more thinking, I decided to head home.

- 10:32 PM, Tomoki's Home -

After some preparations, I finally decide to call it a night.

Advent - Sacred Ground - Chapter 2 - Slant Academy


- DAY 3 - 12/15 - 6:45 AM - Tomoki's Home -

I awake to a startling bad dream. Something about awakening to something... But what does it mean...? ...A half-hour of sleep left. I decided to wake up anyway and eat some breakfast.

- Strike Cafe, Slant, South of the Slant Control Tower -

I casually order a small black coffee and enjoy the time I have until my daily shift begins. All of a sudden, my phone rings... It's Carla.

"What's going on...?" I ask her.
"I-I... I don't know what happened...! It just happened so fast!" She sounded frightened.
"Calm down! Start from the beginning."
"O-okay...," Carla calms down.
"I was going to see Serene at Slant Academy. But as I was preparing for my shift, I found that Serene was being grabbed on camera."
"Wait, you saw camera footage of her...? Where!?"
"Code Blue enables us to get every single camera in the city to monitor."
"Well, it looks like that Code Blue paid off. Where is Serene!?"
"She's still struggling at the academy. The strange thing is that no one is out to hear her cries for help. I could hear her from the station for crying out loud!"
"I'm on my way!!"

I abandoned my coffee and went straight to my car. I turn on the light and siren, then I gunned it. Serene's my only lead, and I'll be damned if I lose her...

- Slant Academy, 7:02 AM -

Once I got to campus, I could still hear Serene screaming for help. Her voice was weak...

Once I approached, a man was holding a handgun to Serene's head.

"Don't come any closer!! I'll blow her brains out!" The kidnapper demanded.
"Why are you doing this!?" I shouted out.
"It's not up to me to decide. I only get paid to grab the girls they want."
"I won't say! Think I'm gullible, huh?"

Using the 'look over there' trick won't work with this guy. I didn't know what to do...

All of a sudden, I could hear a police siren in the distance. No doubt in my mind that it was Carla.

I turned away from the kidnapper to see who it was. Then, all of a sudden...

"Tomoki!!!" Serene screamed out.

I was shot in the heart. I fell to the ground, and Serene was again in danger of being taken like the other girls...

The strange thing was that my wound has blue flames seeping out of it. Then 'Arcadia' started to play in my mind. My field of vision now had a light blue halo around it, kinda like I was in tunnel vision...

I could feel strength gathering inside me. My pain was fading like I wasn't even shot. I could get up now. The kidnapper picked up Serene and was carrying her away to wherever he was taking her.

I got up, grabbed my handgun and aimed.

"Stop now!" I shouted out.
The kidnapper turned around in surprise.
"B-but I killed you! What is that blue flame!? Are you a demon!?"
He fired five rounds. I felt them hit me, but I didn't feel any pain at all. I could see the the bullets attached to my jacket.
"I said stop!!" I fired one shot. The bullet hit his head. He fell to the ground, dropping Serene.

She was in shock over what just happened. She walked away, knelt down, put her hands in her face and cried in panic.

Carla walked towards me.

"Are you okay!?" Carla asked me.
"I'm fine. But I'll need a lift to Trinity."
"I can do that... Your eyes... Is this your Aura...?"
"I guess so... I don't know what it is, though..."
"I'll get an ambulence ready."

I walked to Serene, who was still in shock.

"I'll take you somewhere safe." I said calmly.
"Okay..." She said through her tears.

- 8:32 PM - Trinity Hospital, Northern Slant -

Since I was shot with a bullet, I had to stay there for a few days due to my condition. My Aura abilities wore off, and immense pain was once again attacking my chest. Serene was sitting with me, as the local surgeon gets ready to perform a procedure to remove the bullet.

Once I was under... I couldn't wake up for another 11 hours...

Advent - Sacred Ground - Chapter 3 - Awakening -
« Last Edit: March 04, 2011, 05:49:54 am by SereneMidnight »


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Re: Midnight's Original Works (Writing)
« Reply #3 on: March 26, 2011, 06:42:56 am »
I'm posting with another update for Advent. I got three more chapters to post over the weekend.

This chapter, you'll see part of the iM@S team come into play with the story.

Advent: Sacred Ground - CHAPTER 4: Legacy

- DAY 4 - Trinity Hospital - Northern Slant -
- 7:19 AM - Room 290 - Tomoki's Hospital Room -

I awake to a TV with a music video of Chihaya singing. It reminded myself about that conflict with Serene's kidnapper. 'Arcadia' was playing in my mind and I wasn't even thinking about it. Then my Aura kicked in like adrenaline. I notice Serene and Carla talking to each other. It was a couple of minutes before Serene noticed that I woke up.

"Morning, sleepyhead." Serene said.
"Good morning, Tomoki." Carla said cheerfully.
"Morning, you two." I said.
"So, Tomoki, what was that blue flame...? Was that... your Aura?" Carla said with concern.
"I guess. I have no idea what it was, though."
"Maybe a visit to the library will help us with that, though." Serene said casually.

- 2:11 PM -

"Okay, all you need to do is to get some much deserved bed rest, Mr. Fujishima." My doctor said.
"Good, I need some paid leave." I said gleefully.
"Heh, don't count on much of it. You'll only need 5 days to fully recover."
"Oh well. Good things don't last forever." I said thank you to the doctor and left the hospital. My next stop is to meet Serene at the library.

- Slant Library - Eastern Slant, near Hagiwara Mall -

"Okay, Legacy Auras were identified as a light blue flame. That fits your Aura profile perfectly." Serene said while reading a large history book.
"So in a nutshell, I'm a legend in the making, right?"
"Basically. The first one to awaken to it can also awaken others to their Legacy Aura. That person is called the First Legacy."
"Really...? Maybe you're a Legacy as well...?"
"Hey, you still don't know how to activate your Aura. Don't make any rash decisions!" Serene said with a sheepish look.
"Don't worry. Once I learn how to properly activate it, we'll give it a shot. All you need to do is to study it more for me."
"That I can do."
"I'm going on a drive, you want to come with me?"
"Sure, we can think together."

- 4:59 PM - Slant Local Roads - Near Tomoki's Home -

"Since your conflict with my kidnapper, I saw a badge that signifies that he was an employee at the Command Tower at the middle of Slant. I think that's where the kidnappers are taking the girls." Serene said.
"Somewhere in the Tower, huh...? Even the police force doesn't know much about it..."
"Either way, it's worth a look."
"I don't know how my Captain will say about it, though..."
"Maybe he'll agree with you."
"I can ask sometime this week, but still."

- 6:32 PM - Serene Nakagawa's Home - Northern Slant - Next to Slant Academy -

"Thanks for taking me home, Tomoki." Serene said with a smile on her face.
"No problem."
"Thank you for saving me from death. I thought I was a goner."
"It was the only thing I could do to save your life, even if it meant losing my own."
Serene blushed. "...Really...? I'm... flattered..."
She quickly got out of the car, said goodbye and went inside. I only pondered with what I just said... I left shortly after.

- 9:11 PM - Tomoki's Home -

Since I got a few days off, I might as well get some fun at home. I almost put in a movie when I spotted a letter for me, from... Chihaya Kisaragi?

"Dear Tomoki Fujishima,

I need to keep this brief. I need your help for an assignment: to guard me from the Control Tower of Slant from taking me to their experiment rooms. Since I have no Aura, I fear that I may be a target... Please respond with your decision soon. I can be reached at the phone number enclosed.

Sincerely, Chihaya Kisaragi"

This... I don't know what to say... Maybe she knows more about the interior about the Slant Tower... But how does she know me...?

I'll need to write a reply to her soon...

Advent - Sacred Ground - Chapter 4 - Legacy


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Re: Advent (Original Story)
« Reply #4 on: May 18, 2011, 01:23:42 am »
I posted multiple chapters to my LiveJournal account: